On Compromise

In many cases and situations it is commonly assumed and believed that compromise is a necessary and desirable part of modern life- without it people cannot get on in their own lives or with others. But compromise happens at several levels, and is not always a good thing. I don't like compromise. I have nearly never endured it either fortunately, which I consider to be one of the secrets of my success. In fact I have done pretty much as I have wanted since I have worked for myself, told the truth, lived on my own and done my own thing for years and years so compromise has not been necessary or desirable. Once I had decided that I would not stay in a large hierarchy and compromise in work terms, I have progressively become less willing to compromise.

Recently I have looked at new offices and a first house to buy and considered girlfriends and in all cases options have presented themselves that have been quite nice but not something I am going to happy with in the long term. Faced with the choice between moving into a house office or girl that are not the best located or fit for me. I strongly considered and rejected these options, figuring that more perfect options- my perfect house, the perfect sized office in the perfect location and the most wonderful girl that I connect to at a mental and a physical level simultaneously will come along eventually and taking the first option is not the best strategy. It is a lot easier to get into a (work, personal) relationship than it is to get out of it- once you have gone to the effort of having moved in, it takes a lot of effort to move out.

At a lower level I am a pragmatist- I just about manage to put up with the situations I am faced with (queues, free-riders, delivery delays etc.) and get on with things and make the most of them.

In the middle of life, whilst you should always do the best you can in choosing a partner for a relationship, having found the perfect partner of course you need to compromise on the little things for everyday life to be harmonious. In the same way, once you have found the right employees, giving them autonomy and delegating how and when they get a task done is something that you need to do in order to get the best out of them and to retain them.

But the higher level need to avoid compromise in the macro things such as partners and jobs and homes is something that I protect and believe in, whilst recognizing the need to compromise at a micro level in every day things such as relationships.

As a saying on a chocolate wrapper said: 'Never stop searching for what you love, or you will end up loving what you happen to find.'
 

Author: Simon Buckingham

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